Fence Posts

For most of the century before I arrived, this old house hosted a parade of smoker-drinker-carnivores who poured Paris green arsenic on their potato plants and thought cleansing of any kind was weakening.

That made me think – grumpy old middle-class white guys who live in the country?

“Painted barns are a symptom of an overheated economy, just like the whiz kids driving around downtown Toronto in a BMW with two payments made on it.”

If you’ve ever wondered why they have height, width and weight restrictions on science projects at your school, it’s because of cousin Eddie’s corn dryer.

I discovered at an early age that people who work outside with their hands tend to be more grounded than the rest of the population.

“Nothing lives longer than a horse with a health problem!” says the vet as he purrs out the lane in his limited edition Land Rover.

Will it last through the family reunion this weekend? Should I have it tested? How do I explain delicately to the guests that long showers are not an option?

Then the sun emerged and I saw a glint of gold rim on the gravel bottom.

“I’ve had a little mishap here.”

There was a lot of crumpled paper on the floor, the theme music would falter, and you could see this was all pretty difficult for him.

I shared a party line with Kenny for 20 years. It was a forerunner to the Internet chat room and I found it essential for staying abreast of current affairs.

Ferdinand followed Duke around all day, trying to chase cats with him and bark when visitors arrived.